At age 5, I was convinced that the world was mine. My Dad would tell me all the time that I was the prettiest girl in the world, and I was sure that he was telling the truth. "How lucky am I that God chose ME to be the prettiest? Well, I won't argue with it." I often thought.
Insecurities were non-existent.
My parents also told me time and time again that I could be anything I wanted to be. They would ask the common question, "What do you want to be when you grown up?"
"How can I be everything? A Ballerina, a singer, an actress, an artist, a lawyer, a nurse, a mommy... Do I have to pick just one?" I would think.
The future to me, always seemed so predetermined, as though all I had to do was find the path that was made for me and make all the right decisions.
Around age 12 was when I had begun to notice that other girls were very pretty and I would wonder what specifically made me the prettiest, until eventually I realized that was just something dads say to their daughters (or should always be saying to them, in my opinion); and so came the comparison.
By this point, when the question was asked, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I finally had a response, "A singer".
So I would sing, at every opportunity. I would coordinate mini talent performances with my friends to show off my singing abilities. Until, about 15, when in shows and in choir I would find a talented person who could belt a Mariah Carey note which vibrated through my ego. "How could I ever make it as a singer when my voice doesn't sound like that? No matter how hard I try my voice sounds DIFFERENT! Surely I will be compared. I should just save that for my own ears."
And so ended my brief singing career and my dream to share it died.
Many other dreams came and went in the same fashion: to become an architect ended with not-so-impressive geometry grades.
Professional Dancer: ended with the teasing of high school classmates and the belief that only certain people make it in that arena.
Ballerina: not skinny enough.
Actress: not born under the right star to come from a rich family and go to an acting school.
Writer: ended (correction:paused) with the countless red pen marks from teachers only focused on grammar and forgetting to acknowledge the substance I so eagerly placed on paper.
When I would begin exploring something I became interested in, the first thing I did was look to who was doing it. I would test the waters to see if I too could do it, but eventually would give up once the comparison of my efforts to someone else gave me the sense of not being good enough.
It took until my 25th year on this planet to realize that comparison was only beneficial in terms of understanding that anyone can do it, no matter what "it" is! My desire to become an artist became so loud that I could not ignore it. Initially, I would begin creating something and mid-way would completely stop, insulting my own efforts because it didn't look that Devinci or Dali or even that classmate who has been taking art classes since they were 2! To me, it looked childish and not enough.
Then I began studying the power of thought. And I realized that no two people share the exact same experiences, so comparing skill levels will only sabotage the potential of your own growth. Romero Britto has been an artist for over 20 years. It's overwhelming to think I have to compare myself to him. And the truth is I don't! I'm not him! I don't have to accomplish everything he accomplished to be a successful artist. Additionally, I don't have to meet the standards or expectations of ANYONE to be a successful artist, as long as I stand firmly beside the pieces I create.
And you want to know another thing? I'm going to become a dancer, a singer and an actress. Because I don't have to be like anyone else to do it, as long as I am being me.
The inspiration for my writing this is because I know so many of you who have dreams to do this or do that. And I want you to know that comparing yourself to any successful person could be the thing holding you back. You don't need to be like anyone else to be successful. Your dreams are dying to be shared with the world and you should be doing everything in your powers to share them.
Peace, Love and Godspeed
Luisa Padro
AKA Artysta LuLu
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